How God Proved Himself to Me. PART 7 January 23, 2025

     How God Proved Himself to Me                  PART 7                               January 23, 2025

 

     Dusty and I had been building a home together for what seemed like forever.

 

Everything turned out differently than we had planned. We sunk all of our money and time into that house. Sometimes, we argued over it. Dusty wanted to do things his way, and I wanted to do things the right way.

     

     Dusty’s sense of humor eased the tension in the construction. During a plumbing job, I had to cut and remove a piece of piping.

 

     “OK, honey”, the water’s off,” Dusty said.

 

     I climbed to the top of the ladder, raised the cutters, leaned over the ladder, and cut the pipe. Water slammed into my face like a torrential downpour, almost knocking me off the ladder.

 

     “I’m sorry, Precious. “ He grinned. “I thought I had turned it off.”

 

     We planned to get away and enjoy life as soon as we finished the house. After all, it had been over fourteen years so far.

 

     Dusty had been having pains in his stomach, and I finally convinced him to see a doctor. The devastating news came back that he had Pancreatic cancer. Our entire world crashed as we walked out of the doctor’s office. Would God help us through this? No matter what the doctor said, we still knew that God was in total control.

 

     While I sat alone one day, I felt like God spoke to me—not out loud, but very strongly in my spirit. “I’m going to take him, ” He said, “and you’re going to be OK.” Sobs ripped through my soul.  I don’t want to be OK, I thought. I want my Dusty. But God had other plans. Thus began a life of days filled with tests, trials, and waiting. Through it all, Dusty was SO afraid. God sent many people to help along the way.  Close to the end I took the doctor’s recommendation & called in Hospice, they were a Godsend. They asked Dusty, “Is there anything you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t been able to? “Is there anything you’d like to see, do, or have?”

 

     Dusty named several things he had planned to do on the house but couldn’t. Hospice sent men over and completed several projects on our home. They installed carpet in the living room, they

finished all the trim work in the kitchen & living room.

 

Dusty called me aside and said, “I’m trying to get the house finished for you, Angel Face.”

 

     Our son came over to admire all the improvements. His dad pointed them all out from his wheelchair. He asked our son, “Hey, Trevor, is there anything you need done at your house? Do you want to borrow me?”

 

     Dusty was never in a lot of pain, but the hospice worker gave me a small vial of potent painkillers, just in case.

 

     Dusty woke me one morning yelling, “Oh honey, it hurts, it hurts, Hurry, hurry.”

I jumped out of bed in a flash, ran, and grabbed the small vile of painkiller. I tried to get him to open his mouth so I could put the drops under his tongue; he kept fighting me and wouldn’t open his mouth. He pushed my hand away.

 

     “What are you doing,?” he asked. “I have to pee.”

 

     Dusty was afraid, even more so as his time drew near. My top prayer for him was that God would help him not to be scared and calm his spirit. When Hospice workers said his time was getting close, I prayed all the more deeply that God would grant him peace.

 

     Dusty woke up one morning and said, out of the blue, “I’m going to heaven.”

 

     How do you think you know you’re going to heaven?” I asked him.

 

     “An angel came into my room last night,” he said; “he stood at the foot of my bed and held his arms out. He was a very large  male angel, and he was wearing a long white robe. I felt such power in the room, like nothing I’d ever felt. He stood at the foot of my bed and held his arms out. I just looked at the angel and said, “I’m not ready yet.” The angel smiled, a beautiful white-toothed smile, and then he turned and walked away. I’ll be going to heaven in two weeks.”

 

     Should I believe him? I wondered. Or was he just on too much medication, so he was talking out of his head? When I told one of the Hospice workers what he said, she answered, “No, he will never last for two more weeks; I’m even surprised that he’s still here. I’ve never known anyone like that with a pulse so low who was still alive. They don’t do that. This just doesn’t happen.”

 

     But something undoubtedly happened because Dusty seemed so calm and content. So I asked him how he felt. “Are you afraid”?

 

     “No,” he said.

 

     My prayer to help Dusty not fear death has been answered. Now, reality hit with the full force of having to plan my husband’s funeral. ‘No,” I cried, “Oh God, I can’t do that. I just can’t.”

 

     God seemed to say, “Plan the funeral. I’ll help you.”

 

     God used my daughter, Lynn, and my sister, Penny, to help hold me up while we went to the funeral home and picked out a casket.

 

     My son, Trevor, spent hours driving me around searching for a cemetery lot.

 

     Back at Dusty’s bedside, he was weak but still hanging on. The end was near; as I sat by his bedside and watched him, I thought of all the ways that the Lord had been helping me through one of the worst times of my life. God supplied every need. I grabbed a pen & paper and wrote down my thoughts;

 

     Every Need:

 

     When I needed help—He sent our daughter to stay.

 

     When she needed a break—He sent another daughter.

 

     When an emergency came up—He sent our son.

 

     When a mess needed to be cleaned- He sent our daughter-in-law.

     

     When we needed lifting up– He sent our grandsons.

 

     When we needed a song—He sent a friend with a guitar

 

     When we were hungry but too tired and exhausted to cook—He sent a sister or a brother with food.

 

     When I needed to cry—He sent tears and a shoulder to cry on.

 

     When we needed a laugh—He sent Penny.

 

     When we felt afraid and tired—He sent Hospice.

 

     When I needed rest—He supplied me with sleep.

 

     When I needed counsel—He sent our Pastor.

 

     When I needed encouragement—He came Himself.

 

     Every need, He does supply. I love You, Lord.

 

     I sat and focused on Dusty for over two hours. He got weaker by the minute. The Hospice nurses told me he was waiting for me to say to him that it was all right for him to go.

 

     “Oh God, I can’t do this, please help me.” But, for Dusty’s sake, I had to tell him.

 

     I walked over to Dusty, leaned close to his face, and put my arms around him. I quietly spoke the most challenging words I’ve ever had to say.

 

     “You’ve been fighting for a long time. You don’t have to fight anymore. I’ll be OK, I love you, but you can leave whenever you’re ready.”

 

     Dusty opened one eye,

 and looked straight at me. A tear rolled down his cheek, then his spirit immediately left his body. Noting the time of death, it was exactly two weeks, just as he had said. If we could have gotten a peek into the unseen world I’m sure we would have seen the angel standing at the foot of his bed again, with his arms stretched out. Only this time Dusty would have said, “I’m ready

now.”

I couldn’t control the loud sobs that racked my body like never before. Lynn and I fell into each other’s arms and cried together. God comforted us, knowing that when Dusty was absent from his body, he was present with the Lord. The pain and suffering were finally over for Dusty—his new life was beginning— but I felt like mine was ending. How could anyone live when God had ripped the heart out of them?

 

     A few days later, I felt angry while I was walking alone in the woods, on the same path that Dusty and I had walked together. I raised my fist at God and screamed. “WHY DID YOU TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME?

 

     The answer came, oh, not out loud, but it was very clear, strongly in my spirit. God answered, 

 

     “I didn’t take him away from you. He wasn’t yours; he belongs to me.”

 

     That was so true. We all belong to God. Our loved ones don’t belong to us; they are only on loan from God, and God can call them home anytime He chooses. Nothing can keep us here when our time of life is over, and God calls our name. Also, before God is ready for us, nothing can take us.

 

     Satan controls the whole world. But when we are saved, Satan is no longer in control. God gives us a new heart and the power to live for Him. Although pain and sadness filled my heart, God gave me the peace that passes all understanding.

 

     A few days after I lost Dusty, I had a doctor’s appointment. Dusty and I never went to the doctor alone, we always went together to support each other. Now I would have to go alone. I thought of canceling my appointment, but I had waited so long to get in and had a test scheduled.

 

     I never used to drive if I didn’t have to; I hated driving. Even if I planned to go somewhere, Dusty would take the car the night before, fill it with gas, check the oil, and even clean it for me. But that day, I had to get gas and drive to the doctor by myself. I dreaded the long wait sitting in his office. When I walked into the doctor, I got a big surprise: my sister, Colleen, was waiting for me. I didn’t even know that she knew about my appointment. She was a blessing to me that day and many others as she came to help me work on the house, which still wasn’t finished.

God’s word is true. He is near to the brokenhearted, He used many people and situations to comfort me. Day by day He eased my heartache and life continued.

                                                     

One night I had a dream where Dusty came to me. Not in the body that cancer stole from him. Not the body with the speech impediment that he had dealt with since birth. His voice was crystal clear and sounded awesome. He looked young, handsome, and healthy again as he flashed his beautiful smile at me.

 

 

     We can be walking right beside our children, and they can still fall and get hurt. We can pick them up and try to comfort them. Tell them it’s going to be OK. That’s what God does for us. He promises that He will never leave us. Whenever we get hurt, we can come to him. We can either

hurt without God, or we can hurt with Him. I’d rather hurt with God. He has proven himself numerous times throughout my life. He has never failed me yet. 

 

     Have you ever asked God to prove himself to you? He’s just waiting for an invitation.