Have you ever asked yourself why God never speaks to you? Lately, I’ve been hearing some very touching, “God moments.” Times when a person felt as if God spoke directly to them. And it made me wonder why God doesn’t speak to me more often. As I checked my email yesterday, I opened a featured video, from GodVine.com. It read,
Everyone Thought This Father of the Bride Had Lost It. Until He Stunned Them All. So, of course I headed over to YouTube and clicked on the video. A dad toasted his daughter while the song “I Loved Her First,” by, Heartland, played in the background. Listening to the words caused a lump in my throat.
“I Loved Her First”
Look at the two of you dancing that way
Lost in the moment and each others face
So much in love your alone in this place
Like there’s nobody else in the world
I was enough for her not long ago
I was her number one
She told me so
And she still means the world to me
Just so you know
So be careful when you hold my girl
Time changes everything
Life must go on
And I’m not gonna stand in your way
But I loved her first and I held her first
And a place in my heart will always be hers
From the first breath she breathed
When she first smiled at me
I knew the love of a father runs deep
And I prayed that she’d find you someday
But its still hard to give her away
I loved her first
My thoughts took a plunge to my past. My chest felt hollow and an old ache returned. My dad never showed any love to me, only contempt. He was abusive, called me names and told me I looked like I combed my hair with an egg beater. The memories pained my soul.
The music stopped and another video came on the screen—A video of the dad, and four other guys, singing a tune by The Temptations.
I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day.
When it’s cold outside I’ve got the month of May.
I guess you’d say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl (my girl, my girl)
Talkin’ ’bout my girl (my girl).
I’ve got so much honey the bees envy me.
I’ve got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees.
I started digging for the tissues. My dad never loved me like that. Then God spoke to me, not out loud, but strongly, in my spirit, and said, “You’re My Girl.”
I burst into tears and reached for another tissue to wipe the drips. My breathing slowed as I remembered a time, long ago, when God was my number one, I told Him so. And even during the times I may have forgotten about Him, he never forgot about me, not for a moment. He still considers me “His Girl.”
Suddenly, a splash of color caught my eye as I glanced to the left. A beautiful Bright orange and black Oriole landed on the feeder just outside my window. Usually, when you make eye contact with a bird, they fly away. Not that time. The Oriole looked me square in the eye, cocked his head to the side, opened his beak and sang a sweet song. Then he focused on the orange I had set out that morning. He continued to eat, as the song played, then he flew away. I closed iTunes and went to my inbox. There was a forward from a friend, Barb, with a picture of Jesus, gazing lovingly at a young woman, asking
“Do You Love Him?” God uses many things to speak to us every day—nature, people, His word. We just have to open our eyes and look around. I had an earthly father, but was never given his love. Yet, I have a heavenly father who gives His all encompassing love, without merit or conditions. It is a love that protects and desires to work all things together for our good. A love that brings hope and a future without fear. In this love we find approval, not because of anything we have done, but because of what has been done for us. Without question, His love changes everything. So, if I love Him as I claim to, instead of asking why God never speaks to me, the question could be,
Why don’t I speak more often for Him?